Note: The following is a chapter from the book I wrote titled, “What do I do when …”. I wrote it to answer teenagers toughest questions about God. However, even if you are not a teen, I think this chapter will give you some clarity as well as a few steps to take when walking through tough times. If you would like to get your copy of the book, just click the button below this chapter.
What do I do when … bad things happen to good people?
Wouldn’t it be great to live in a perfect world? A world where words like murder, war, disease, and divorce did not exist. I think we could all agree that living in a place like that would be incredible; however, that is not the world we live in. The reality is that we live in a place where pain, injustice, and harm are far too commonplace.
Why? Why does this happen? Why do thousands of children die every year of hunger-related diseases? Why do so many families feel the pain of divorce? How is it that seemingly perfectly healthy people can be struck down in the prime of their lives with crippling diseases like cancer?
Why? Why is it like this? I have asked myself these questions many times as I watch the evening news or hear of bad things going on in my own neighborhood.
As we look around our world in the times in which we live, we could easily become bitter, disgruntled, and disillusioned by all the horrible things that we see happening. However, with all the bad that’s going on in our world today, there is one thing you and I need to remember—and that is God is good.
God Is Good
The first thing you need to remember when bad things happen to good people is that God is good. First John 4:7-8 is a pretty interesting Scripture. It says, “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
God is love. If you stop and think about it, those three words say quite a bit. God, this big, huge, ominous being that is sometimes hard for us to figure out, can be summed up in one word: love. At the very core, the very center of God’s existence, is love. God is the definition of love itself.
So God is love. That’s pretty cool, but what does it really mean?
What is love?
Love is a pretty vague word. Is love an action, or is love a feeling? Is love about the opposite sex, or is it about family and friends? How do you know you’re in love? Can you fall in love? If so, can you fall out of love? Love is a big word, and if God is love and you want to know God, then it’s pretty important to understand and know what love is, right?
Even though love is a big word that is sometimes hard to wrap our minds around, I think we would all agree that at the very core and center of love is...goodness. Love is good. If it is not good, then it is not love—because love is good.
The Bible tells us that God is love, and if God is love and love is always good, then...God is always good. In fact, the Bible tells us that in Psalm 34:8: “Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.”
Scripture lets us know that God is always good but also that every good thing that happens to us on planet Earth comes to us from God. James 1:17 says, “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.”
Every good thing comes from God, so when you have a good day at school, that day came from God. That yearly birthday check that you get in the mail—your grandma wrote it, but it really came from God. Those tingles in your tummy when you see your special someone came from God. When your parents gave you the upgrade in your allowance and that Christmas gift you always wanted, they were both gift-wrapped from God Himself. Everything good comes from God, because God is good.
The problem is that, even though God is good, not everything in our world is good. And because there is such a cloud of mystery surrounding God, it is very easy for people to begin to think that though God is good, sometimes He is also bad. When bad things happen, which they do, many well-intentioned people say that God in His goodness and love made it happen. When a child dies, people trying to cope with the grief that comes with their loss may say things like “God loved the little angel so much He wanted to take it up to heaven to be with Him.” When someone gets diagnosed with stage three cancer, many well-intentioned people say, “God in His love and grace is taking her through this trial because He wants her to learn something.”
When I hear people say those things, I want to stop them and say, “Now, hold on. Let’s stop and think about this for a minute. What you are saying is that God, who is good, is causing bad things to happen to the people He loves.”
Think about that for a minute. Does the Bible say, “Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good...so He killed your child”? Does the Bible say, “Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good...so He gave you cancer and wanted you to die in excruciating pain so He could teach you something”?
Let me ask you a question. Is giving a child to a parent and then taking him away from that parent so you can have him good? Is intentionally wanting someone to not only die, but to die an almost unbearable death, good? If you knew someone who stole from people, if you knew someone who killed people, would you, by definition, call that person good?
No.
With all of the suffering and injustice taking place in our world today, it’s important that you know God is not good sometimes and then bad other times.
No, God is always good. However, despite all of the goodness of God, bad things sometimes happen to good people. As mentioned, pain, harm, and injustice are far too commonplace. That brings us to another question. If harm, disease, and injustice don’t come from God, then who or where do they come from?
The Devil Is Bad
When bad things happen to good people, you have to remember that it is the devil who is bad. The Bible says in John 10:10, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” Reading this passage lets us know that there are two main forces at work today in our world. First of all, there is the force of good, which is God, and secondly there is the force of evil, which is the devil (the wicked one).
Every day these two forces are engaged in a battle of epic proportions. God is trying to bring us good, and the devil is trying to bring us harm. The devil, who absolutely hates God, knows that he cannot defeat Him because God shut the devil down when Jesus died on the cross. So every day, the devil comes in wherever he can to bring harm, injustice, and disease to God’s most prized possession—and that is humanity.
So when you look around the world and see horrible things happening, understand that those things are not coming from God. They are actually attacks from God’s archenemy, the devil, who is trying to hurt people, in order to hurt God.
So what exactly do you do when bad things happen to good people? More specifically, what do you do when bad things happen to you?
Hold onto what you believe.
Well, first of all, you hold onto what you believe. One time my family was on vacation and my wife, Veronica, and I were sitting in some lawn chairs watching our two sons, Jordan and Logan, playing in the pool. Logan was only about four years old, and he was holding onto the side of the pool talking to his brother, when all of a sudden, he was gone. His hands had slipped off the side of the pool, and he fell down into water that was way over his head!
I instantly jumped up from my chair and dove to the side of the pool. As I shoved my hands in the water, I saw this look of absolute fear on my son’s face. He was under the water, hands flailing around, reaching for anything he could grab hold of. When he saw my hands, he latched onto me with an absolute death grip. There was no way he was letting go. I pulled him up, and he made it through just fine.
In the world we live in, it is very common for everything to be going great, when all of a sudden, tragedy strikes. When it does, like my son, people find themselves in way over their heads and scared to death. If you find yourself in one of those situations, realize that your Father is right there. Just as I came to my son’s rescue, God is reaching out for you. Look for Him. He may be reaching for you with a Scripture that you read in the Bible, with a message from your pastor, with good advice from a friend, or with the memory of something you heard years ago. Whatever it is He’s reaching out to you with, grab hold of it with an absolute death grip and don’t let it go.
No matter what might be going on right now, never, ever let go of what you believe. It may be the very thing that pulls you up to safety.
Never Jump Ship
Second, when bad things happen to you, you determine to never jump ship. I once knew a pastor who lost his daughter in a tragic car accident. As he stood by his daughter’s casket after delivering an amazing message about the goodness and faithfulness of God, a man came up to him and said, “Pastor, how can you stay so strong during a time like this? I would have already given up on God.”
The pastor told the man, “Sir, I don’t know why this happened, and I never will. Because of that, I have decided to refuse to become bitter over a mystery.”
That pastor never quit on God or bailed out on his Christian faith. There will be times in your life when things will happen to you or to a friend and no matter how hard you try, you will not be able to explain why. Those mysteries could very easily cause you to lose hope or lose faith in God. Don’t do it. Like my pastor friend and like the apostle Paul, don’t jump ship. Don’t give up. Don’t bail out on your faith. Stay with the ship, and let God see you through the storm.
Trust God for supernatural provision.
Third, when bad things happen to you, being to trust God to provide everything you need. I don’t know if you know it or not, but God is a big God. Many times throughout human history God has done some pretty amazing things for His people. He parted the Red Sea. (Ex. 14.) One time, He made the sun stand still so His people could win a battle. (Joshua 10.) He turned water into wine (John 2). He fed five thousand people with just a few pieces of fish and bread. (Matt. 14.) And that’s just naming a few.
God is a big God. He is also a good God, and He wants to intervene in your life and provide for whatever you need. If or when you go through a tough time, realize you don’t have to go through it alone. Call on God. Take some time to get alone and tell God what is going on, and ask Him to intervene in your situation. He has been there for countless other people, and He will be there for you.